i'm just very very thankful for my bio prac. it couldnt be me. i'm not so smart. neither did i studied alot. based on my own efforts i thought i would fail or maybe jus pass. i started studying later than last sem and last sem i got a D. but i believe God is working through me. i simply prayed that my results will glorify God.
initially, i was quite afraid that my results would not be a good testimony to others. i didn't excel academically all these while. i was afraid being an ST would be worse. i was afraid of commiting my time for God's work and purpose in my life would affect my results. so i prayed to God while deciding between being an ST and my studies (cos i noe bad results doesnt glorify God as well).
but one fine day, as i was reading a book, this verse pop out and spoke to my heart.
"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."
Matt 6:33
immediately, i took that step of faith.
after all these, i realise that it is really not what i can do for God but what God can do through me if i allow Him to.
why did i doubted God in the first place? He's so much greater and bigger than i thought...
i'm touched.
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
jus wanna thank God for His grace many many times. many times i should have face the consequences but He delivered me out. He is merciful and always faithful.
of all that i can rem these few weeks:
hp (found it 2 days after in my pocket... lol. like jus in front of me but i couldnt see)
cough (was coughing every night till i cant slp. but was healed aft asking ppl to pray)
minor sprain (fell down the stairs. pain for awhile and was ok. but while walking back hm, pain starts again. but was healed completely)
presentation (He took away my fear while presenting. was very sacred before and aft)
test and exams (limited study time but He brought me thru)
prayer prep (managed to do it just in time despite church and SJ all during the weekends)
p & w prep (managed to do it just in time despite of cant access to internet, almost lost my thumbdrive, exams...)
bad mens cramp (dissapeared completely after awhile of praying)
thumbdrive (left it at e plaza but God preserve it)
i know He's always there. :)
"I have set the Lord always before me.
Becuase he is at my right hand,
I will not be shaken.
Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices;
my body will also rest secure"
Ps. 16:8-9
of all that i can rem these few weeks:
hp (found it 2 days after in my pocket... lol. like jus in front of me but i couldnt see)
cough (was coughing every night till i cant slp. but was healed aft asking ppl to pray)
minor sprain (fell down the stairs. pain for awhile and was ok. but while walking back hm, pain starts again. but was healed completely)
presentation (He took away my fear while presenting. was very sacred before and aft)
test and exams (limited study time but He brought me thru)
prayer prep (managed to do it just in time despite church and SJ all during the weekends)
p & w prep (managed to do it just in time despite of cant access to internet, almost lost my thumbdrive, exams...)
bad mens cramp (dissapeared completely after awhile of praying)
thumbdrive (left it at e plaza but God preserve it)
i know He's always there. :)
"I have set the Lord always before me.
Becuase he is at my right hand,
I will not be shaken.
Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices;
my body will also rest secure"
Ps. 16:8-9
Thursday, January 11, 2007
The Five Love Languages
My primary love language is probablyQuality Time
with a secondary love language being
Words of Affirmation.
Complete set of results
| Quality Time: | 11 | |
| Words of Affirmation: | 7 | |
| Physical Touch: | 5 | |
| Receiving Gifts: | 4 | |
| Acts of Service: | 3 |
Information
Unhappiness in relationships, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. Sometimes we don't understand our partner's requirements, or even our own. We all have a "love tank" that needs to be filled in order for us to express love to others, but there are different means by which our tank can be filled, and there are different ways that we can express love to others.Take the quiz
Friday, January 05, 2007
Thursday, January 04, 2007
heh. its been awhile i've been updating. haha. been enjoying myself... ha. i love camps. esp, christian camps. even though you are tired physically, there's somthing inside you tt's being renewed and refreshed. And that's probably the thing i need. not an emotional high or an excitement for a few days but really, a touch from God. i thank God for all the things i've went thru and that i was made a stronger and mature person inside.
it started of with 18 dec to 24 dec. well. just to share the main thing that i brought home, that is faith. faith to trust, faith to pray, faith to believe. i may seem to be a very devoted christian, being involve in this and that and going to church every week. but it doesn't mean i have lotsa faith. it is natural to have faith in the things that we can see. but the bible says, 'blessed is the man who have faith in the things that he cannot see'. even though i want to have faith in the things i can't see, i find it hard. so by God's grace, He miraculously add unto me faith. how? through God. heh. God uses experience and sermons.
first, i felt a burden to pray for my friend who's having blocked ears but i didnt dare to go upfront and pray for her. so happen that the sermon is about the Holy Spirit. from 1 corinthains 2:3-5, "I was with you in weakness, in fear, and in trembling. And my speech and my preaching were not with persuasive words of human wisdom, but in demostration of the spirit and of power, that your faith should not be in the wisdom of men but in the power of God". i learnt that when i pray, it is not about whether my prayers are answered. As long as i'm righteous before God and ask, i'm depending on the Holy Spirit's power, not my power. so i neednt worry if she will be healed or not. it is just simply taking the step of faith, relying on His power and leaving the results to God. and that experience and word itself just added me faith. thank God. God still choose to heal her in the end though i didnt step forward.
2 other thing that God used to give me faith. one was when we prayed for sun so we could have our sports day and on the 20th, for the first time of the camp, we saw sun. when we reached west coast park, we saw dark clouds but amazingly, the area that we used, just that area, had sun shining so brightly that most of us had sunburn. though we had sunburn but still we thank God cos if the sun wasn't strong enough, the ground would be so much muddier. only after we've finished the games and was getting on the bus, it rained again. the 2nd thing was this. we would experience blackouts every night after service. my pastor thought it could be more than just things that seemed to happen. he believed its spiritual attacks from the evil one. so that night we prayed cos we really needed the lights to take our group photo. again, amazingly, one by one, the lights in the hall was litted up. 500 over campers witnessed the 2 incident that happened.
then 24, 25 dec i was in kids ministry. since none of my friends can make it for the retro christmas party, i've no excuse not to go down kids ministry to help.
26 to 30 dec was another camp. indeed, as the name, "metamorphosis" suggest, it is a life-transforming camp. frankly speaking, i didnt enjoyed the 1st day. the programs are great, awesome, fun, funny, all positive but it's my heart that wasn't right. have you ever been to a place with great, fun-loving ppl, nice shows, nice everything. you smile, you laugh but it's just for that moment? somehow, there's still this down feeling deep inside you despite everything else that's going on around you? indescribable. but thank God it last only for a day. cos that night itself, i just poured out everything to God and prayed that He will help me to enjoy the camp and that i will not harden my heart to everything that's happening around me.
sure enough, day 2's morning session spoke right into my heart. as the sermon goes... following Jesus will cost us... it will cost us our rights, our relationships, our riches... as the speaker goes sharing about how he grumbled and complained when he was involved in a camp by his own kind will when he can choose not to be involve. He started complaining to God when people are not only unappreciative of his help, yet blamed him for the things that went wrong, when in the first place, he wasn't even responsible for the camp. And God spoke to him, showing him that he haven't really surrendered his all to God, especially his rights to serve God despite circumstances, although he made a commitment to God that he wants to surrender his life to God and often pray that God can use him. it was the same situation for me. as all of you know i was physically tired from the camp on 18-24dec and once back, my bro ask me to take over him in some kids ministry work. though reluntant, i still went. inwardly, i haven't surrendered my rights to God. rights of resting, rights of choosing not to serve... inside me, i was complaining so much. i even missed the retro christmas party to help out in kids ministry. i feel that i have many, many rights. though outwardly i seemed surrendered, inwardly i'm not. thus when i came to this camp as an ATL... i came with a tired and complainy attitude and God know just the right words i needed to hear at the right time. of course it was so much better when i surrendered myself to God again and cast all my cares upon him. by doing that, i'm not working by my own strength but by the Holy Spirit's power. It is a miracle seeing the team unite and enjoying each other. It is simply relying on His power. i thank God for such kind, loving, sincere and merciful team i had.
3rd day was amazing! we went to the streets to evangelise, despite our fears and everything, we lay it before God and went by the power of the Holy Spirit. i guess many ppl do not want to hear the gospel is bcos many thought that we are trying to: 1) brain wash them, 2) persuade/force/pull/harrass them till they become Christians like how some salesman would do. 3) they think Christians are a bunch of selfish ppl who only thinks their religon is the only way. 1 & 2 is definately out although some Christian still do. i think we need to know that it is not by us that ppl are save but simply by God's power. we can't force the truth down their throats. 3 is partially correct. we do think that Christ is the only way but our only reason for telling others is really out of love than selfish desires. it is so more can be save. take for example, if i found a place that gives a BMW car as freebie, would i not tell all my friends, perhaps even everyone i see on streets about the good news? yea. at the same time we do understand that ppl have their own say, own sets of doubts and questions about Christianity so we do respect them as well. actually many of us Christian started of like that too. well, so you do have your right to reason, and that leads me to: right to reason, check it out! -> http://www.everystudent.com.sg/right2reason. anw, back to sharing of faith. amazingly God placed many different ppl in my path! 1st, a maid, then a construction worker who's smoking, then a road sweeper and then 2 malays who's smoking behind the alley. thank God i had experiences with smokers. i have friends who smoke but honestly i almost choke cos the smoke went right into my face! i tried not to show as far as possible... still, i'm glad they are open about it after i told them that i'm just sharing my faith.
after everything, somehow i had a desire to find out more about Christianity myself so that i can answer their questions and also be more credible about what i'm believing. God has indeed shown me all that i need to put my faith in Him and have allowed me to experience Him more. but not everyone have experienced God like i do. Some need prove, some need evidence, reason and credibility to believe.
Well, God can control everything in the world except our freewill. He can allow things to happen, place ppl in our life to show us or tell us some truths about God himself but ultimately, it is still our choice. How can He touch us if we never allowed Him to come into our hearts? "Today if you hear my voice, do not harden you hearts..." (Heb 3:15)
Anw, i thoroughly enjoyed the camp! all the magic shows, skits... korean dramas- rain vs. amos (LOL), da chang jing... and the two fun-loving emcees, my team... had a talk with sara and learnt sth frm her. though as young as she is, she taught me to look at ppl beyond their faces and to really hear their heart... yea. and we had wonderful workshops, wonderful sermons, wonderful worship... more than that, i thank God i met HIM.
and you may think, all stories have a happy ending huh? nah... when i came back, i had 2 days of rest and sch starts. the worst thing is, i had a theory test and i totally forgot till 1plus in the morning when my friend was asking me abt the test thru msn and i was like, "huh, what test?" truthfully, i panicked even though my msn nick writes, "in God i trust"-> so contradicting. oh, thank God for msn, thank God for jane, thank God for friends who chat with me till so late. haha. lol. anw, as i calmed down, i decided to commit it to God in prayer. i told God, "i know its my responsibility to remember and study so i would bravely face the consequences of my actions but please help me to remember all that i have studied in this short period of time i still have... i'll do all that i can for Your glory" so ya... if my results is bad, it is my due consequence... but if i manage to pass, it is by God's grace and His glory, i take no credit cos i spend less than 1 or 2 hours studying. i tried to study more but i fell asleep.
i thank God for the change in me. i guess in the past i would prob blame God, blame the camp, blame the test that's set on the 1st day of sch, blame my friends who didnt tell me earlier, blame everything except me. i see myself now grow and mature in God. My life is really God's answered prayer to those who are praying for me, esp my mum... as some might know, my character had a 360 degrees change. i think it's hard to believe how i was like when i was young. Ask my mum, she'll be so very excited to tell u. haha.
Well, that's it for the day.
it started of with 18 dec to 24 dec. well. just to share the main thing that i brought home, that is faith. faith to trust, faith to pray, faith to believe. i may seem to be a very devoted christian, being involve in this and that and going to church every week. but it doesn't mean i have lotsa faith. it is natural to have faith in the things that we can see. but the bible says, 'blessed is the man who have faith in the things that he cannot see'. even though i want to have faith in the things i can't see, i find it hard. so by God's grace, He miraculously add unto me faith. how? through God. heh. God uses experience and sermons.
first, i felt a burden to pray for my friend who's having blocked ears but i didnt dare to go upfront and pray for her. so happen that the sermon is about the Holy Spirit. from 1 corinthains 2:3-5, "I was with you in weakness, in fear, and in trembling. And my speech and my preaching were not with persuasive words of human wisdom, but in demostration of the spirit and of power, that your faith should not be in the wisdom of men but in the power of God". i learnt that when i pray, it is not about whether my prayers are answered. As long as i'm righteous before God and ask, i'm depending on the Holy Spirit's power, not my power. so i neednt worry if she will be healed or not. it is just simply taking the step of faith, relying on His power and leaving the results to God. and that experience and word itself just added me faith. thank God. God still choose to heal her in the end though i didnt step forward.
2 other thing that God used to give me faith. one was when we prayed for sun so we could have our sports day and on the 20th, for the first time of the camp, we saw sun. when we reached west coast park, we saw dark clouds but amazingly, the area that we used, just that area, had sun shining so brightly that most of us had sunburn. though we had sunburn but still we thank God cos if the sun wasn't strong enough, the ground would be so much muddier. only after we've finished the games and was getting on the bus, it rained again. the 2nd thing was this. we would experience blackouts every night after service. my pastor thought it could be more than just things that seemed to happen. he believed its spiritual attacks from the evil one. so that night we prayed cos we really needed the lights to take our group photo. again, amazingly, one by one, the lights in the hall was litted up. 500 over campers witnessed the 2 incident that happened.
then 24, 25 dec i was in kids ministry. since none of my friends can make it for the retro christmas party, i've no excuse not to go down kids ministry to help.
26 to 30 dec was another camp. indeed, as the name, "metamorphosis" suggest, it is a life-transforming camp. frankly speaking, i didnt enjoyed the 1st day. the programs are great, awesome, fun, funny, all positive but it's my heart that wasn't right. have you ever been to a place with great, fun-loving ppl, nice shows, nice everything. you smile, you laugh but it's just for that moment? somehow, there's still this down feeling deep inside you despite everything else that's going on around you? indescribable. but thank God it last only for a day. cos that night itself, i just poured out everything to God and prayed that He will help me to enjoy the camp and that i will not harden my heart to everything that's happening around me.
sure enough, day 2's morning session spoke right into my heart. as the sermon goes... following Jesus will cost us... it will cost us our rights, our relationships, our riches... as the speaker goes sharing about how he grumbled and complained when he was involved in a camp by his own kind will when he can choose not to be involve. He started complaining to God when people are not only unappreciative of his help, yet blamed him for the things that went wrong, when in the first place, he wasn't even responsible for the camp. And God spoke to him, showing him that he haven't really surrendered his all to God, especially his rights to serve God despite circumstances, although he made a commitment to God that he wants to surrender his life to God and often pray that God can use him. it was the same situation for me. as all of you know i was physically tired from the camp on 18-24dec and once back, my bro ask me to take over him in some kids ministry work. though reluntant, i still went. inwardly, i haven't surrendered my rights to God. rights of resting, rights of choosing not to serve... inside me, i was complaining so much. i even missed the retro christmas party to help out in kids ministry. i feel that i have many, many rights. though outwardly i seemed surrendered, inwardly i'm not. thus when i came to this camp as an ATL... i came with a tired and complainy attitude and God know just the right words i needed to hear at the right time. of course it was so much better when i surrendered myself to God again and cast all my cares upon him. by doing that, i'm not working by my own strength but by the Holy Spirit's power. It is a miracle seeing the team unite and enjoying each other. It is simply relying on His power. i thank God for such kind, loving, sincere and merciful team i had.
3rd day was amazing! we went to the streets to evangelise, despite our fears and everything, we lay it before God and went by the power of the Holy Spirit. i guess many ppl do not want to hear the gospel is bcos many thought that we are trying to: 1) brain wash them, 2) persuade/force/pull/harrass them till they become Christians like how some salesman would do. 3) they think Christians are a bunch of selfish ppl who only thinks their religon is the only way. 1 & 2 is definately out although some Christian still do. i think we need to know that it is not by us that ppl are save but simply by God's power. we can't force the truth down their throats. 3 is partially correct. we do think that Christ is the only way but our only reason for telling others is really out of love than selfish desires. it is so more can be save. take for example, if i found a place that gives a BMW car as freebie, would i not tell all my friends, perhaps even everyone i see on streets about the good news? yea. at the same time we do understand that ppl have their own say, own sets of doubts and questions about Christianity so we do respect them as well. actually many of us Christian started of like that too. well, so you do have your right to reason, and that leads me to: right to reason, check it out! -> http://www.everystudent.com.sg/right2reason. anw, back to sharing of faith. amazingly God placed many different ppl in my path! 1st, a maid, then a construction worker who's smoking, then a road sweeper and then 2 malays who's smoking behind the alley. thank God i had experiences with smokers. i have friends who smoke but honestly i almost choke cos the smoke went right into my face! i tried not to show as far as possible... still, i'm glad they are open about it after i told them that i'm just sharing my faith.
after everything, somehow i had a desire to find out more about Christianity myself so that i can answer their questions and also be more credible about what i'm believing. God has indeed shown me all that i need to put my faith in Him and have allowed me to experience Him more. but not everyone have experienced God like i do. Some need prove, some need evidence, reason and credibility to believe.
Well, God can control everything in the world except our freewill. He can allow things to happen, place ppl in our life to show us or tell us some truths about God himself but ultimately, it is still our choice. How can He touch us if we never allowed Him to come into our hearts? "Today if you hear my voice, do not harden you hearts..." (Heb 3:15)
Anw, i thoroughly enjoyed the camp! all the magic shows, skits... korean dramas- rain vs. amos (LOL), da chang jing... and the two fun-loving emcees, my team... had a talk with sara and learnt sth frm her. though as young as she is, she taught me to look at ppl beyond their faces and to really hear their heart... yea. and we had wonderful workshops, wonderful sermons, wonderful worship... more than that, i thank God i met HIM.
and you may think, all stories have a happy ending huh? nah... when i came back, i had 2 days of rest and sch starts. the worst thing is, i had a theory test and i totally forgot till 1plus in the morning when my friend was asking me abt the test thru msn and i was like, "huh, what test?" truthfully, i panicked even though my msn nick writes, "in God i trust"-> so contradicting. oh, thank God for msn, thank God for jane, thank God for friends who chat with me till so late. haha. lol. anw, as i calmed down, i decided to commit it to God in prayer. i told God, "i know its my responsibility to remember and study so i would bravely face the consequences of my actions but please help me to remember all that i have studied in this short period of time i still have... i'll do all that i can for Your glory" so ya... if my results is bad, it is my due consequence... but if i manage to pass, it is by God's grace and His glory, i take no credit cos i spend less than 1 or 2 hours studying. i tried to study more but i fell asleep.
i thank God for the change in me. i guess in the past i would prob blame God, blame the camp, blame the test that's set on the 1st day of sch, blame my friends who didnt tell me earlier, blame everything except me. i see myself now grow and mature in God. My life is really God's answered prayer to those who are praying for me, esp my mum... as some might know, my character had a 360 degrees change. i think it's hard to believe how i was like when i was young. Ask my mum, she'll be so very excited to tell u. haha.
Well, that's it for the day.
Tuesday, December 26, 2006
Christmas
i got this email and decided to post it cos i think it makes sense though Christmas is over. have u ever heard of how Christmas came abt? well, i tell u soon ya. haven't been on-lining for some time heh...
*:: Why JESUS is better than Santa ::*
*Santa lives at the North Pole ...
JESUS is everywhere. *
*Santa comes but once a year.
JESUS is an ever present help.
Santa fills your stockings with goodies ...
JESUS supplies all your needs.
You have to wait in line to see Santa ...
JESUS is as close as the mention of His name.
Santa doesn't know your name,
all he can say is "Hi little one, what's your name?" ...
JESUS knew our name before we did.
Not only does He know our name, He knows our history & future,
and He even knows our hearts & how many hairs are on our heads.
All Santa can offer is HO HO HO ...
JESUS says "Cast your cares on me for I care for you."
Santa may make you chuckle but ...
JESUS gives you joy that is your strength.
While Santa puts gifts under your tree ...
JESUS became our gift by dying on the cross for you & I.*
*It's obvious there is really no comparison. *
*We need to remember WHO Christmas is all about. *
*We need to put CHRIST back in Christmas.*
**
*No Christ; no Christmas*
*Know Christ; know Christmas!*
**
*Jesus is still the reason for the season.*
**
*:: Why JESUS is better than Santa ::*
*Santa lives at the North Pole ...
JESUS is everywhere. *
*Santa comes but once a year.
JESUS is an ever present help.
Santa fills your stockings with goodies ...
JESUS supplies all your needs.
You have to wait in line to see Santa ...
JESUS is as close as the mention of His name.
Santa doesn't know your name,
all he can say is "Hi little one, what's your name?" ...
JESUS knew our name before we did.
Not only does He know our name, He knows our history & future,
and He even knows our hearts & how many hairs are on our heads.
All Santa can offer is HO HO HO ...
JESUS says "Cast your cares on me for I care for you."
Santa may make you chuckle but ...
JESUS gives you joy that is your strength.
While Santa puts gifts under your tree ...
JESUS became our gift by dying on the cross for you & I.*
*It's obvious there is really no comparison. *
*We need to remember WHO Christmas is all about. *
*We need to put CHRIST back in Christmas.*
**
*No Christ; no Christmas*
*Know Christ; know Christmas!*
**
*Jesus is still the reason for the season.*
**
Monday, December 11, 2006
Praise God! He knows my everything, my ever loving, compassionate, merciful, wonderful, faithful, awesome God!
Weeks ago, as i vividly recalled
Alone in a quiet corner in the discussion room of the vast library
Sick, weary and worried
I began talking to God:
"Lord, i'm tired. I'm feeling lousy and down and sick. There's so much to do... so much on my mind... how am i gonna have DG later in this state?"
I flipped the Word of God
I came across Isaiah 41:10:
"Fear not, for I am with you;
Be not dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you,
Yes, I will help you,
I will uphold you with my righteous hand."
How timely it is!
I was strengthened instantly by His word.
Again, i'm encouraged.
Been praying for my sis to come back to God & recently she did. She had an experience with God that's so real and I'm glad. I know even the times when she's backslidding, God's still with her for He said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you" (Hebrews 13:5)
Btw, went ZOUK OUT. Rendering 1st aid. It was indeed an eye opener! Never have I seen this part of the world I guess. I mean, so many ppl vomitting, lying around, drunk all around the stretch of that beach! Never have I been overnight in sentosa before too. It was also my first time going to SGH A&E though I was attached there before. I've learnt much, spending the night with fellow sjab first aiders.
Weeks ago, as i vividly recalled
Alone in a quiet corner in the discussion room of the vast library
Sick, weary and worried
I began talking to God:
"Lord, i'm tired. I'm feeling lousy and down and sick. There's so much to do... so much on my mind... how am i gonna have DG later in this state?"
I flipped the Word of God
I came across Isaiah 41:10:
"Fear not, for I am with you;
Be not dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you,
Yes, I will help you,
I will uphold you with my righteous hand."
How timely it is!
I was strengthened instantly by His word.
Again, i'm encouraged.
Been praying for my sis to come back to God & recently she did. She had an experience with God that's so real and I'm glad. I know even the times when she's backslidding, God's still with her for He said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you" (Hebrews 13:5)
Btw, went ZOUK OUT. Rendering 1st aid. It was indeed an eye opener! Never have I seen this part of the world I guess. I mean, so many ppl vomitting, lying around, drunk all around the stretch of that beach! Never have I been overnight in sentosa before too. It was also my first time going to SGH A&E though I was attached there before. I've learnt much, spending the night with fellow sjab first aiders.
You Laid Aside Your Majesty by Noel Richards
You laid aside Your majesty
Gave up everything for me
Suffered at the hands
Of those You had created
You took all my guilt and shame
When You died and rose again
Now today You reign
In heaven and earth exalted
I really want to worship You, my Lord
You have won my heart and I am Yours
Forever and ever
I will love You
You are the only one who died for me
Gave Your life to set me free
Now I lift my voice to You in adoration
You laid aside Your majesty
Gave up everything for me
Suffered at the hands
Of those You had created
You took all my guilt and shame
When You died and rose again
Now today You reign
In heaven and earth exalted
I really want to worship You, my Lord
You have won my heart and I am Yours
Forever and ever
I will love You
You are the only one who died for me
Gave Your life to set me free
Now I lift my voice to You in adoration
Monday, November 20, 2006
THANK GOD FOR FAMILY AND FRIENDS!!! I'M BLESSED BY ALL OF U!!!
in chronological order (groups):
to my- YU family, esp my dearie bro, sam: thanks i know all of ur love for me... *elated*
to my dearest NR0514: you girls and guy really gave me a shock!!! lol. u all can join TCS... no sorry is media corp... never leaked out a single clue. i really didnt expect tt! ha. but it was great! u were sweet! *surprised!!!*
to my lovable fellow crusaders: whoa! u girls & guys are really really sweet!!! *encouraged*
to my wonderful nissi 1 aspiration: haha... thanks for being there with me every step of the way! *remembered*
to the ultimate sat PKC team: heys... u all huh... though i expected a surprise but i really didnt expect tt kind of surprise! thank God didnt have diarrhoea. haha. but seriously enjoyed being in suspense too! *disgusted yet enjoyed*
to everyone: ur messages, gifts, sweat and bld (those who took time to plan&shop), effort, crazy ideas, even ur prayers (dont under estimate prayers k... tested and proven. cos God hears & He's far awesomely great than we can eva imagine!) really warms my heart, be it in the form of sms, letter, cards, etc. even if it is jus a simple greeting like, "happy birthday!" i appreciate tt! bcos i noe tt diff ppl expresses their love diff. it's ok if u dont rem my birthday... i think it is not the birthday that matters... it is really true friendship that matters (cos i'm someone who forgets birthday easily too though many are my dear friends... im not a detailed person... ahhh) anw, i really feel loved and contented...
last but not least: wanna thank God... i've been asking for a touch, a renewed spirit cos i've been really dried up spiritually cos of the choices i make and the things i choose to hold on to or place more impt.
thank God.
i know only one thing tt can satisfy me... haha. i asked and He gave, love, grace, hope, peace & joy onve again! right on my birthday! :)
"My soul finds rest in God alone"Ps 62:1
hey and other friends who dont noe my birthday or noe but didnt wish or didnt get me anything, please please dont feel bad k. the truth is, it is the friendship that matters... i will still choose to love u & not bear any grudges. i choose to love u without any condition... yet many a times by my own humanly and selfish nature, i always struggled with that... to love someone only when someone loves me. no, but i do not want tt bcos i desire for a pure heart. to love others like how Jesus would. though i'm not an perfect example of Christ, yet i believe He's continue moulding me, kicking of my bad habits, breakng bondages of sin in my life, convicting me & helping me to realise where i really am and helping me to change- to be more like Him! :)
in chronological order (groups):
to my- YU family, esp my dearie bro, sam: thanks i know all of ur love for me... *elated*
to my dearest NR0514: you girls and guy really gave me a shock!!! lol. u all can join TCS... no sorry is media corp... never leaked out a single clue. i really didnt expect tt! ha. but it was great! u were sweet! *surprised!!!*
to my lovable fellow crusaders: whoa! u girls & guys are really really sweet!!! *encouraged*
to my wonderful nissi 1 aspiration: haha... thanks for being there with me every step of the way! *remembered*
to the ultimate sat PKC team: heys... u all huh... though i expected a surprise but i really didnt expect tt kind of surprise! thank God didnt have diarrhoea. haha. but seriously enjoyed being in suspense too! *disgusted yet enjoyed*
to everyone: ur messages, gifts, sweat and bld (those who took time to plan&shop), effort, crazy ideas, even ur prayers (dont under estimate prayers k... tested and proven. cos God hears & He's far awesomely great than we can eva imagine!) really warms my heart, be it in the form of sms, letter, cards, etc. even if it is jus a simple greeting like, "happy birthday!" i appreciate tt! bcos i noe tt diff ppl expresses their love diff. it's ok if u dont rem my birthday... i think it is not the birthday that matters... it is really true friendship that matters (cos i'm someone who forgets birthday easily too though many are my dear friends... im not a detailed person... ahhh) anw, i really feel loved and contented...
last but not least: wanna thank God... i've been asking for a touch, a renewed spirit cos i've been really dried up spiritually cos of the choices i make and the things i choose to hold on to or place more impt.
thank God.
i know only one thing tt can satisfy me... haha. i asked and He gave, love, grace, hope, peace & joy onve again! right on my birthday! :)
"My soul finds rest in God alone"Ps 62:1
hey and other friends who dont noe my birthday or noe but didnt wish or didnt get me anything, please please dont feel bad k. the truth is, it is the friendship that matters... i will still choose to love u & not bear any grudges. i choose to love u without any condition... yet many a times by my own humanly and selfish nature, i always struggled with that... to love someone only when someone loves me. no, but i do not want tt bcos i desire for a pure heart. to love others like how Jesus would. though i'm not an perfect example of Christ, yet i believe He's continue moulding me, kicking of my bad habits, breakng bondages of sin in my life, convicting me & helping me to realise where i really am and helping me to change- to be more like Him! :)
Thursday, November 09, 2006
FRIENDS...
i really thank God for them!!! :) :) :)
Micheal W. Smith - Friends Lyrics
Packing up the dreams God planted
In the fertile soil of you
I can't believe the hopes He's granted
Mean the chapter in your life is through
BRIDGE:
But we'll keep you close as always
It won't even seen you've gone
'Cause our hearts in big and small ways
Will keep the love that keeps us strong
CHORUS:
And friends are friends forever
If the Lord's the Lord of them
And a friend will not say never
'Cause the welcome will not end
Though it's hard to let you go
In the Father's hands we know
That a lifetime's not too long
To live as friends
And with the faith and love God's given
Springing from the hope we know
We will pray the joy you'll live in
Is the strength that now you show
BRIDGE CHORUS(2x)
Though it's hard to let you go
In the Father's hands we know
That a lifetime's not too long
To live as friends
At first i couldnt catch what the song is abt... the thing that attracted me was only the chorus & the tune at first but aft studying the lyrics repeatedly, i begin to make meaning out of it. i feel that the writer probably wrote this song for a friend that will be leaving him. i think the chorus is nice... enjoy... to my friends, i love u!!! *hugs* :) :) :)
i really thank God for them!!! :) :) :)
Micheal W. Smith - Friends Lyrics
Packing up the dreams God planted
In the fertile soil of you
I can't believe the hopes He's granted
Mean the chapter in your life is through
BRIDGE:
But we'll keep you close as always
It won't even seen you've gone
'Cause our hearts in big and small ways
Will keep the love that keeps us strong
CHORUS:
And friends are friends forever
If the Lord's the Lord of them
And a friend will not say never
'Cause the welcome will not end
Though it's hard to let you go
In the Father's hands we know
That a lifetime's not too long
To live as friends
And with the faith and love God's given
Springing from the hope we know
We will pray the joy you'll live in
Is the strength that now you show
BRIDGE CHORUS(2x)
Though it's hard to let you go
In the Father's hands we know
That a lifetime's not too long
To live as friends
At first i couldnt catch what the song is abt... the thing that attracted me was only the chorus & the tune at first but aft studying the lyrics repeatedly, i begin to make meaning out of it. i feel that the writer probably wrote this song for a friend that will be leaving him. i think the chorus is nice... enjoy... to my friends, i love u!!! *hugs* :) :) :)
Thursday, November 02, 2006
jus wanna thank God after so long. it's been awhile u've heard from me i guess. throughout, thr's ups & downs but i thank God He still loves me. thr r many times when i struggled thoughts. thoughts like, "oh no, thr's really so much to do" & i set my mind on the things i need to do. i ended up stressed. have u had such experience? sometimes at night, i couldn't slp. somtimes in the morning, i jus don't wanna wake up, prob running away frm reality. tt was wat happen 3 weeks after the mission trip?? i seriously didnt expect tt. probably, i was a little too complacent when i thought that my stuff was more impt than God...
anw, on sat, we had some community event whr we hold an elderly hand for a walkathon. the aim was to get the old ppl out for walks. got to hear some interesting sharings from this old man tt's really encouraging. do enjoyed the time! then back to church. during the before service prayer, somehow i felt thr's this heaviness in my heart. i can't seem to seek God face to face. thoughts like, "u haven't been putting God first, who are u to come to Him again? u r always stuck in the sin-confess-sin-confess cycle, u r not worthy to come back to Him..." i didn't realise it was satan's lies. i remember someone said, the difference between satan's voice & the Holy Spirit's voice is satan's one is condeming but the Holy Spirit one is a gentle reminder, a conviction in ur heart. so we went on with praise & worship. didn't feel like jumping... anw, i tried to be sincere as possible in worship cos i noe God looks at the heart. tt day's sermon was on pleasing God. i really want to please God. so i went forward. at the altar, i really pour everything to Him, i told Him all tt i'm feeling & wat's in me... i told Him i really wanna please Him & love Him with all my heart... then someone prayed for me. The only thing tt struck me in the prayer was 1 John 1:9, "If we confess our sins, He is faithful & just to forgive our sins & cleanse us from all unrighteousness" at once, those condeming thoughts left me & i knew from my heart, i'm forgiven.
then came sun. i woke up, the 1st thing i rem was God. i came before Him again. somehow, another sets of condeming thoughts came, thoughts like, "if God really love u, He'll speak to u with audible voice, thr's no power in ur prayer, u r so weak, u always fail..." i began to ask Him many qns like, "God, why do some ppl hear u with audible voice, why not me? why do u not show me very, very great signs & wonders?" after talking to Him for some time & being still before Him, God showed me that all the negative thought i had were lies from the evil one [i confessed & asked for His forgiveness] & He showed me that He's always speaking to me. He created me in such a way to recognise this sort of His voice. God created everyone different & of course the way He speaks to us is also different. God even reminded me once again of the so many miracles that i've seen in thailand, & even in Lighthouse miracle service... i began to counter those thoughts 1 by 1 with the word of God. God says,"I love u", He says "u r worthy, u r a child of God." He says "ask anything in My name that is according to the will of the Father & it'll be given to u", He says, "ur weaknesses is made perfect in My strength", He says, "My grace is sufficient for u", He says, "I've overcomed the world". I really felt love again & freedom. though i'm in the midst of storm (busyness) but i hold on to Him who's sovereign & in control. Most of all, faithful & trustworthy...
even wanna thank God on mon. though do have many things to do, still i kept my eyes on Him, telling Him i'm trusting Him to guide me in everything, leaving everything into His hands. whatever happens in prayer meeting is definately God! Then wed, v. amazingly when i came hm frm meeting eileen ong (haha. need to put surname cos i got 2 friends by the name of eileen!) it started to drizzle. told God please dont let it pour heavily till i reached the shelter. it drizzled till i was safe & sound at hm then it started to pour heavily. & when i'm gg to sch for lm, it started to drizzle again. once again i told God, pls let me reach sch before it rain heavily. i trust u... & God did again! thank God not only for ans my praying but He really knows when i needed those encouragement from Him. those ans prayers... it really assured me of His love for me so strongly!
There's jus too much to thank God for that i can't blog finish... haha. even wanna thank God for today's sj training. i'm beginning to really love my girls... really... haha. i actually enjoyed them & don't find it a dread to organise training anymore. honestly, the previous com training... i was really stress, tired & burnt out... but now i'm beginning to find the joy! though its a really short period of time & short of trainers too, i jus wanna give all i can to them & wish them all the best!
i'll continue to trust God and fix my eyes on Him!!! :)
anw, on sat, we had some community event whr we hold an elderly hand for a walkathon. the aim was to get the old ppl out for walks. got to hear some interesting sharings from this old man tt's really encouraging. do enjoyed the time! then back to church. during the before service prayer, somehow i felt thr's this heaviness in my heart. i can't seem to seek God face to face. thoughts like, "u haven't been putting God first, who are u to come to Him again? u r always stuck in the sin-confess-sin-confess cycle, u r not worthy to come back to Him..." i didn't realise it was satan's lies. i remember someone said, the difference between satan's voice & the Holy Spirit's voice is satan's one is condeming but the Holy Spirit one is a gentle reminder, a conviction in ur heart. so we went on with praise & worship. didn't feel like jumping... anw, i tried to be sincere as possible in worship cos i noe God looks at the heart. tt day's sermon was on pleasing God. i really want to please God. so i went forward. at the altar, i really pour everything to Him, i told Him all tt i'm feeling & wat's in me... i told Him i really wanna please Him & love Him with all my heart... then someone prayed for me. The only thing tt struck me in the prayer was 1 John 1:9, "If we confess our sins, He is faithful & just to forgive our sins & cleanse us from all unrighteousness" at once, those condeming thoughts left me & i knew from my heart, i'm forgiven.
then came sun. i woke up, the 1st thing i rem was God. i came before Him again. somehow, another sets of condeming thoughts came, thoughts like, "if God really love u, He'll speak to u with audible voice, thr's no power in ur prayer, u r so weak, u always fail..." i began to ask Him many qns like, "God, why do some ppl hear u with audible voice, why not me? why do u not show me very, very great signs & wonders?" after talking to Him for some time & being still before Him, God showed me that all the negative thought i had were lies from the evil one [i confessed & asked for His forgiveness] & He showed me that He's always speaking to me. He created me in such a way to recognise this sort of His voice. God created everyone different & of course the way He speaks to us is also different. God even reminded me once again of the so many miracles that i've seen in thailand, & even in Lighthouse miracle service... i began to counter those thoughts 1 by 1 with the word of God. God says,"I love u", He says "u r worthy, u r a child of God." He says "ask anything in My name that is according to the will of the Father & it'll be given to u", He says, "ur weaknesses is made perfect in My strength", He says, "My grace is sufficient for u", He says, "I've overcomed the world". I really felt love again & freedom. though i'm in the midst of storm (busyness) but i hold on to Him who's sovereign & in control. Most of all, faithful & trustworthy...
even wanna thank God on mon. though do have many things to do, still i kept my eyes on Him, telling Him i'm trusting Him to guide me in everything, leaving everything into His hands. whatever happens in prayer meeting is definately God! Then wed, v. amazingly when i came hm frm meeting eileen ong (haha. need to put surname cos i got 2 friends by the name of eileen!) it started to drizzle. told God please dont let it pour heavily till i reached the shelter. it drizzled till i was safe & sound at hm then it started to pour heavily. & when i'm gg to sch for lm, it started to drizzle again. once again i told God, pls let me reach sch before it rain heavily. i trust u... & God did again! thank God not only for ans my praying but He really knows when i needed those encouragement from Him. those ans prayers... it really assured me of His love for me so strongly!
There's jus too much to thank God for that i can't blog finish... haha. even wanna thank God for today's sj training. i'm beginning to really love my girls... really... haha. i actually enjoyed them & don't find it a dread to organise training anymore. honestly, the previous com training... i was really stress, tired & burnt out... but now i'm beginning to find the joy! though its a really short period of time & short of trainers too, i jus wanna give all i can to them & wish them all the best!
i'll continue to trust God and fix my eyes on Him!!! :)
Friday, October 27, 2006
Love iis the Greatest
If i could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didnt love others. I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. If i had the gift of prophecy, and if i understood all of God's secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if i had such faith that i could move mountains, but didnt love others, i would be nothing. If i gave everything i have to the poor and even sacrified my body, i could have boast about it, but if i didnt love others, i would have gained nothing. [1cor 1-3]
Really love this verse taken from NLT version
-Copied & pasted from Angie's blog-
Haha. i love this verse too. I think love is the greatest. U could give a thousand presents, a million nice, sweet sounding words, a billion helping hands, a trillion listening ear but w/o love... it is nth... it bcomes jus an act. But if all that u gave is only words, a small gift, a little note or jus simply a hug but it came with so much love & so much sincerity... even the smallest gift to others could meant the biggest to u! Just like how margie gave me a small bear, though i've always thought tt bear is an impractical present... but i truly treasured it cos i felt tt love & sincerity so much. It changed my views, my perspective totally to buy a bear as a gift... i'm amazed by the change in me... now, i'd digged out all my previous beary presents to look & appreciate & just to love them. i'm jus so thankful for whatever things that comes along my way cos i believe tt it was out of love tt ppl gave bcos i'm not some big person who ppl needs to curry favor... ur results/promotions/salary r not in my hands... haha. so i can b assured of ur sincerity. Haha. Nah... Jus joking la.
Some ppl show LOVE thru gifts,
Some, show LOVE thru actions,
Some, show LOVE thru words.
I'd appreciate them all cos it was out of LOVE that u GAVE.
Anw, I jus wanna say a BIG THANK U to those who've loved me... It's not the gift itself but really the love that comes along with it...
THANKS SO MUCH!!! :)
In Christ Love,
Sharon Yu
If i could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didnt love others. I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. If i had the gift of prophecy, and if i understood all of God's secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if i had such faith that i could move mountains, but didnt love others, i would be nothing. If i gave everything i have to the poor and even sacrified my body, i could have boast about it, but if i didnt love others, i would have gained nothing. [1cor 1-3]
Really love this verse taken from NLT version
-Copied & pasted from Angie's blog-
Haha. i love this verse too. I think love is the greatest. U could give a thousand presents, a million nice, sweet sounding words, a billion helping hands, a trillion listening ear but w/o love... it is nth... it bcomes jus an act. But if all that u gave is only words, a small gift, a little note or jus simply a hug but it came with so much love & so much sincerity... even the smallest gift to others could meant the biggest to u! Just like how margie gave me a small bear, though i've always thought tt bear is an impractical present... but i truly treasured it cos i felt tt love & sincerity so much. It changed my views, my perspective totally to buy a bear as a gift... i'm amazed by the change in me... now, i'd digged out all my previous beary presents to look & appreciate & just to love them. i'm jus so thankful for whatever things that comes along my way cos i believe tt it was out of love tt ppl gave bcos i'm not some big person who ppl needs to curry favor... ur results/promotions/salary r not in my hands... haha. so i can b assured of ur sincerity. Haha. Nah... Jus joking la.
Some ppl show LOVE thru gifts,
Some, show LOVE thru actions,
Some, show LOVE thru words.
I'd appreciate them all cos it was out of LOVE that u GAVE.
Anw, I jus wanna say a BIG THANK U to those who've loved me... It's not the gift itself but really the love that comes along with it...
THANKS SO MUCH!!! :)
In Christ Love,
Sharon Yu
Wednesday, October 25, 2006
heylo jus to share with u some pics of the mission trip! i love thai! haha! enjoy... :)the americans frm tanesee (hope i get the spelling correct) [clockwise, only americans]: marilyn-> tommy-> sue-> daniel-> rob-> kathy!! love them!
my team (clockwise)->samuel, eileen, sara, me, su yi, mylene, yanxiang, lily, christine, elsa!!!
my singing buddy cum gummy bear! hur hur...
a little boy, captured at United Ministries, Pattaya by Samuel Lim (nice shot! isnt it?)
"What would you do? Will you continue to look on and ignore the Living Water that has been given to you at a price that only He can afford? Would you take it and tell the rest of the people about it? What would you do?
-Adapted from Samuel Lim's blog-
God's creation, captured at Jontien beach by Samuel Lim
"Magnificant isn't it? Imagine God reaching out to you from heaven. It's just too awesome."
-Adapted from Samuel Lim's blog-
"How great is God!"
that's all... there's more... but its with either sam/sara... :)
hello. havent beeen updating. whoa. but recently there's just so many things tt happened tt i'm really thankful/grateful for, though i'm physically, mentally & emotionally tired/down but God still encourages me!
let me look into my journal and see what i can tell u abt. :)
20/10/06
oh i was late for attachment cos didnt set my alarm... was too tired. but now i learnt to set alarm when i'm on mornings (bad example or rather habit but its the truth... still working on tt... friends u know me... haha. give me time k.) oh anw, was reminded to focus on Him despite the circumstances & it didnt turned out too bad. LOL. my CI even thanked me for informing her tt i'm late on my own initiative. she said tt was v. nice of me. huh? oh. thanks. but pls. its not a gd testimony cos being late doesnt glorify God, right? :)
21/10/06
Today, God encouraged me! we had our SMAG grp meeting with mylene, elsa, JC & me. we shared abt hw was our week & God showed us all a part of the huge puzzle. He showed us how He used mylene to teach me tt ministry starts everwhere & how he used what i have learnt to cause JC to pray for the man at her workplace & it in turns encourages candice to pray too. oh & today's YI sermon was really great! abt Eph 6:10-18. it was abt prayer! tt's my heart for YI too... i think tt's the correct focus! abt God & His words... i felt God ans prayers! oh, btw, rem the lady i wanted to pray for? i wanted to give up but God encouraged me thru tt sermon to press on... :)
22/10/06
lately i felt all the excitement dying down... but i noe faith is not abt feelings... so i cont trusted God (cos He've proved to me tt He is worth tt trust). I realise tt the more i feel tt i'm losing the focus/passion, the more i should pray... today woke up, praise, worshipped & thank God for all the things He've done lately. Prayed & covered my whole house. it was wonderful! There was really a BIG difference in my hm. Amazingly, my sis agreed to watch LE sermons, read the bible & go to church! My younger bro played Don Moen Christian Music... they dont ususally do so... my sis would usually either go out, slp, talk on the phone/watch tv. my bro would play games/msn. watched the LE sermon too by Ps Rony Tan. Amazingly, he too, talked abt Eph 6:10-18! Isnt tt too much of a coincidence?
oh. today went LE W with my sis. initially, thought it was a boring sermon... yawn alot... but i was reminded tt thr's a purpose for everything. so i asked God what is that He wants me to learnt cos i do not want to waste my time thr. As I began to seek, He began to show. Sth that speaks to my heart was "1. God is still sovereignly in charge of everything. 2. nothing can happen to me w/o God knowledge. 3. For we know that all things works for the good of those who love Him. 4. He makes intercession for me (Heb 7:25)-> I didnt know tt!" I'm so encouraged & comforted to hear tt. oh. & God really changed my stearotyped thinking abt tt pastor!
23/10/06
A stressful day. Also prayed alot... ha. well... i felt tt God wants me to apologise if not He wouldnt show me tt i'm in the wrong during tt mission trip. Anw, was really scared cos it was a long time ever since we talked & i really didnt know how to start. I did stumbled here & thr but still managed. Thank God. Phew! Oh. i was stress abt the P&W i need to lead then after too. but thank God, God still reminded me tt He's sovereignly in control though w.o guitar. Amazingly when it started, i didnt panicked...
24/10/06
Went to this sjab duty to transport old ppl to a catholic service. it was a gd experience cos its the 1st time i saw a catholic service... those ppl r nice & i did pray for them too.
25/10/06
A very very nice catholic lady went away today. I prayed for her too. I wonder why God placed so many catholics in my path lately... I saw uncle philip (a complete stranger with a green car, also another catholic) on my way to NYP today. He jus talked to me so I talked to him. well, still praying... haha. :)
tt's all folks.
let me look into my journal and see what i can tell u abt. :)
20/10/06
oh i was late for attachment cos didnt set my alarm... was too tired. but now i learnt to set alarm when i'm on mornings (bad example or rather habit but its the truth... still working on tt... friends u know me... haha. give me time k.) oh anw, was reminded to focus on Him despite the circumstances & it didnt turned out too bad. LOL. my CI even thanked me for informing her tt i'm late on my own initiative. she said tt was v. nice of me. huh? oh. thanks. but pls. its not a gd testimony cos being late doesnt glorify God, right? :)
21/10/06
Today, God encouraged me! we had our SMAG grp meeting with mylene, elsa, JC & me. we shared abt hw was our week & God showed us all a part of the huge puzzle. He showed us how He used mylene to teach me tt ministry starts everwhere & how he used what i have learnt to cause JC to pray for the man at her workplace & it in turns encourages candice to pray too. oh & today's YI sermon was really great! abt Eph 6:10-18. it was abt prayer! tt's my heart for YI too... i think tt's the correct focus! abt God & His words... i felt God ans prayers! oh, btw, rem the lady i wanted to pray for? i wanted to give up but God encouraged me thru tt sermon to press on... :)
22/10/06
lately i felt all the excitement dying down... but i noe faith is not abt feelings... so i cont trusted God (cos He've proved to me tt He is worth tt trust). I realise tt the more i feel tt i'm losing the focus/passion, the more i should pray... today woke up, praise, worshipped & thank God for all the things He've done lately. Prayed & covered my whole house. it was wonderful! There was really a BIG difference in my hm. Amazingly, my sis agreed to watch LE sermons, read the bible & go to church! My younger bro played Don Moen Christian Music... they dont ususally do so... my sis would usually either go out, slp, talk on the phone/watch tv. my bro would play games/msn. watched the LE sermon too by Ps Rony Tan. Amazingly, he too, talked abt Eph 6:10-18! Isnt tt too much of a coincidence?
oh. today went LE W with my sis. initially, thought it was a boring sermon... yawn alot... but i was reminded tt thr's a purpose for everything. so i asked God what is that He wants me to learnt cos i do not want to waste my time thr. As I began to seek, He began to show. Sth that speaks to my heart was "1. God is still sovereignly in charge of everything. 2. nothing can happen to me w/o God knowledge. 3. For we know that all things works for the good of those who love Him. 4. He makes intercession for me (Heb 7:25)-> I didnt know tt!" I'm so encouraged & comforted to hear tt. oh. & God really changed my stearotyped thinking abt tt pastor!
23/10/06
A stressful day. Also prayed alot... ha. well... i felt tt God wants me to apologise if not He wouldnt show me tt i'm in the wrong during tt mission trip. Anw, was really scared cos it was a long time ever since we talked & i really didnt know how to start. I did stumbled here & thr but still managed. Thank God. Phew! Oh. i was stress abt the P&W i need to lead then after too. but thank God, God still reminded me tt He's sovereignly in control though w.o guitar. Amazingly when it started, i didnt panicked...
24/10/06
Went to this sjab duty to transport old ppl to a catholic service. it was a gd experience cos its the 1st time i saw a catholic service... those ppl r nice & i did pray for them too.
25/10/06
A very very nice catholic lady went away today. I prayed for her too. I wonder why God placed so many catholics in my path lately... I saw uncle philip (a complete stranger with a green car, also another catholic) on my way to NYP today. He jus talked to me so I talked to him. well, still praying... haha. :)
tt's all folks.
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
HAHAHA. today played a very fun game with my fellow crusaders. there is only 1 rule. when anyone ask a qns, u must not ans. sounds simple?? haha. well, u gotta play it with the experts. it really takes a lot of brain juices to come out with qns tt can tricked the other party into answering and u have to always stay alert so as not to be tricked. it's really challenging to play with ppl like samuel and eugene... it trains ur mind... haha. LOL. and makes u slightly smarter. haha. was very tired initially but later became so excited! i was determined not to get trick but to trick others. haha... but failed many times initially. and when i finally managed to trick eugene, haha! i was elated. LOL. failure is the mother of success. heh.
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
jus had a wonderful time with God. it didnt started well. seriously, i'm so weak. i'm easily affected by the things that i can see and touch... i did stumble and fall but i'm glad His grace is sufficient for me.
i tried slping at 1am. i couldnt. suddenly thr's jus so much on my mind. worrying. planning... i couldnt control myself, the thoughts jus and keep coming. i did prayed but soon, i find my mind wander off again. i know the facts. i know God is real, He'll provide whateva I need, He has ald proved to me so many many times, I know thr's really no pt worrying if i dont do anything abt it, i know I just have to trust Him... but i jus cant control my thoughts. i hate tossing and turning in bed like that. this really forced me to get up. i decided to fill my mind with God's word.
I read and read... trust in the Lord... ... then suddenly this verse strucked me. "If I had cherished sin in my heart, the Lord would not have listened" Ps. 66:18 (NIV)
I've always known this but didn't have a biblical reference. anyway, i stopped to ask God... He revealed that I havent been putting Him first and I habored pride unknowingly in my heart. I thought I'm becoming more godly, unknowingly becoming more critical towards others too. No man can be godly without the power of God. I've come to realise tt i do struggle... i'm really weak. It is only in God that I can find strength. Lord, please forgive my iniquities...
D G A7
O let the Son of God enfold you
D Bm
With His Spirit and His love
G A7 D D7
Let Him fill heart and satisfy you soul
G A7
O let Him have the things that hold you
D Bm
And His Spirit like a dove
G A7
Will descend upon your life
D
And make you whole
G A7 F#mBm G A7 D D7
Jesus, O Jesus, come and fill Your lambs
G A7 F#mBm G A7 D
Jesus, O Jesus, come and fill Your lambs
G A7
O come and sing this song with gladness
D Bm
As your hearts are filled with joy
G A7 D D7
Lift your hands in sweet surrender to His name
G A7
O give Him all your tears and sadness
D Bm
Give Him all your years of pain
G A7 D
And you'll enter into life in Jesus' name
i tried slping at 1am. i couldnt. suddenly thr's jus so much on my mind. worrying. planning... i couldnt control myself, the thoughts jus and keep coming. i did prayed but soon, i find my mind wander off again. i know the facts. i know God is real, He'll provide whateva I need, He has ald proved to me so many many times, I know thr's really no pt worrying if i dont do anything abt it, i know I just have to trust Him... but i jus cant control my thoughts. i hate tossing and turning in bed like that. this really forced me to get up. i decided to fill my mind with God's word.
I read and read... trust in the Lord... ... then suddenly this verse strucked me. "If I had cherished sin in my heart, the Lord would not have listened" Ps. 66:18 (NIV)
I've always known this but didn't have a biblical reference. anyway, i stopped to ask God... He revealed that I havent been putting Him first and I habored pride unknowingly in my heart. I thought I'm becoming more godly, unknowingly becoming more critical towards others too. No man can be godly without the power of God. I've come to realise tt i do struggle... i'm really weak. It is only in God that I can find strength. Lord, please forgive my iniquities...
D G A7
O let the Son of God enfold you
D Bm
With His Spirit and His love
G A7 D D7
Let Him fill heart and satisfy you soul
G A7
O let Him have the things that hold you
D Bm
And His Spirit like a dove
G A7
Will descend upon your life
D
And make you whole
G A7 F#mBm G A7 D D7
Jesus, O Jesus, come and fill Your lambs
G A7 F#mBm G A7 D
Jesus, O Jesus, come and fill Your lambs
G A7
O come and sing this song with gladness
D Bm
As your hearts are filled with joy
G A7 D D7
Lift your hands in sweet surrender to His name
G A7
O give Him all your tears and sadness
D Bm
Give Him all your years of pain
G A7 D
And you'll enter into life in Jesus' name
Sunday, October 15, 2006
I think the difference between me, now and then was- I'm become more aware of God. Even though I know God is anytime, anywhere since young, I didn't really experience Him cos I didn't have that connection with Him. It's a choice of my own. Now I choose to connect with Him, throughout the day, telling Him all my thoughts and feelings, my joy, my thanksgiving, my praise, my sorrows, my confessions... everything. And I know He hears. He becomes more evident.
Yesterday, when I was in cellgrp, I suddenly felt a sense of loneliness, though I'm surrounded by so many ppl. (maybe bcos I missed my recent mission team so much! we really had so much fun! and maybe bcos I haven't really connect with them yet). So happen the sermon was on loneliness and there's so much God spoke to me abt thru tt sermon. It reminded me that I've loose my focus subconsciously. If I focus on God then I'll never feel lonely. But I choose to focus on my circumstances though I want to focus on God (cos it's just so easy to look at the things you can see and touch and neglecting the things we cannot see... the spiritual things that is real as well), just like wat daWL shared about Paul... what he want to do, he do not do & vice versa. God began convicting me. In cell, i'm not so proactive... the kind who sit & wait and not so sensitive to other ppl's needs. Maybe cos since young, I'm always the youngest in cellgrp so I'm always very well taken care of. But now God put me in a cell where most of them are younger than me to help me to change my attitudes. An environment for me to care for others, to be sensitive to their needs, like how the older korkor & jiejies of the past used to treat me.
Then during Power Kidz Church service, the kids were very distracted but I remember to focus on God, not circumstances and kept praying. Later on, God really encouraged me thru the kids as I see them quiet and listening and even clapped for the teachers!
Then today, I woke up. Though I tried to worship God, but I was also distracted by other thoughts and the hunger and thirst for God seems lesser. So I began to pray for a desire for God once again. Then I was abit sian... maybe discouraged. I thought I should be more godly, I shouldn't laze around wasting time... I should do this and that yet I did not do. Then, my dad ask me to watch this sermon from lighthouse by Ps Rony Tan. Initially, I don't want but later on I did so that my bro could watch it too. In the end, the sermon really spoke to my heart. Just when I needed them. It talks about how to live as a victorous christian. It doesn't mean that once you recieve Christ you'll be perfect. If that is so, what is John 1:9 for? and what will it means, "to look to the author and perfector of our faith" and also, "our weaknesses are made perfect in His strength"? We are not perfect but God is still in the process of moulding us to be more like Him. Take note: Is to be like God, not become God. We can never become God. Being a Christian is in the process of changing to be more Christ-like. If we thought that Christians are perfect ppl then we'll be so discouraged. Only God is perfect. Also, in the disc, there's a bonus segment of miracle service. When I saw so many lives are healed, changed and transformed, people out of pain, out of depression, out of gangs... ppl with broken family, abusive father, full of hatred and resentment, totally changed and in the process of changing still... It once again touched my heart and encouraged me to be praying more zealously for that lady. [if anyone
wants to watch can come to me... highly recommended]
I knew at once, God knows how am I feeling all these while. That is why He placed all these things to happen at that moment when I needed them. He knew exactly when I needed encouragement. He answered my prayers to have more desire for Him. I think in the past God does ans my prayers and see me thru, just tt i'm not aware cos I'm not connected with Him throughout. I think my weak point that often cause me to loose my focus is usually busy schedule. I'm chocked up with so much things to do that I neglected God. That's why I love hols so I could have a great retreat with God. I just pray that I will not stumble and fall when school reopens. Please pray for me too... oh. more than my own desires, may His will be done.
Anyway, PRAISE GOD!!!
Yesterday, when I was in cellgrp, I suddenly felt a sense of loneliness, though I'm surrounded by so many ppl. (maybe bcos I missed my recent mission team so much! we really had so much fun! and maybe bcos I haven't really connect with them yet). So happen the sermon was on loneliness and there's so much God spoke to me abt thru tt sermon. It reminded me that I've loose my focus subconsciously. If I focus on God then I'll never feel lonely. But I choose to focus on my circumstances though I want to focus on God (cos it's just so easy to look at the things you can see and touch and neglecting the things we cannot see... the spiritual things that is real as well), just like wat daWL shared about Paul... what he want to do, he do not do & vice versa. God began convicting me. In cell, i'm not so proactive... the kind who sit & wait and not so sensitive to other ppl's needs. Maybe cos since young, I'm always the youngest in cellgrp so I'm always very well taken care of. But now God put me in a cell where most of them are younger than me to help me to change my attitudes. An environment for me to care for others, to be sensitive to their needs, like how the older korkor & jiejies of the past used to treat me.
Then during Power Kidz Church service, the kids were very distracted but I remember to focus on God, not circumstances and kept praying. Later on, God really encouraged me thru the kids as I see them quiet and listening and even clapped for the teachers!
Then today, I woke up. Though I tried to worship God, but I was also distracted by other thoughts and the hunger and thirst for God seems lesser. So I began to pray for a desire for God once again. Then I was abit sian... maybe discouraged. I thought I should be more godly, I shouldn't laze around wasting time... I should do this and that yet I did not do. Then, my dad ask me to watch this sermon from lighthouse by Ps Rony Tan. Initially, I don't want but later on I did so that my bro could watch it too. In the end, the sermon really spoke to my heart. Just when I needed them. It talks about how to live as a victorous christian. It doesn't mean that once you recieve Christ you'll be perfect. If that is so, what is John 1:9 for? and what will it means, "to look to the author and perfector of our faith" and also, "our weaknesses are made perfect in His strength"? We are not perfect but God is still in the process of moulding us to be more like Him. Take note: Is to be like God, not become God. We can never become God. Being a Christian is in the process of changing to be more Christ-like. If we thought that Christians are perfect ppl then we'll be so discouraged. Only God is perfect. Also, in the disc, there's a bonus segment of miracle service. When I saw so many lives are healed, changed and transformed, people out of pain, out of depression, out of gangs... ppl with broken family, abusive father, full of hatred and resentment, totally changed and in the process of changing still... It once again touched my heart and encouraged me to be praying more zealously for that lady. [if anyone
wants to watch can come to me... highly recommended]
I knew at once, God knows how am I feeling all these while. That is why He placed all these things to happen at that moment when I needed them. He knew exactly when I needed encouragement. He answered my prayers to have more desire for Him. I think in the past God does ans my prayers and see me thru, just tt i'm not aware cos I'm not connected with Him throughout. I think my weak point that often cause me to loose my focus is usually busy schedule. I'm chocked up with so much things to do that I neglected God. That's why I love hols so I could have a great retreat with God. I just pray that I will not stumble and fall when school reopens. Please pray for me too... oh. more than my own desires, may His will be done.
Anyway, PRAISE GOD!!!
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
God really put what I've learnt into practise. Of the long entry i wrote, let me summurise: Through the this mission trip, I desire to have a pure and tender heart and to be open to God's prompting anytime, anywhere...
This attachment is never the same. I thought my heart was already hardened. I thought I had seen it all... but this attachment is so different. No longer am I concerned about doing all the work (prarmeters, keeping the patients clean, clearing bedpans, making the ward look neat) but rather I'm concerned with the patients more. God really helped me to have a tender heart again- to really feel for ppl (He gave me when I was young but I lost it somehow)... I saw this lady who told me that she wanted to die. God's love really overwhelmes me at that moment. It just saddens my heart. I kept on telling her that she cannot go yet, she have yet to see the light... She told me that she have no chance to see that light. It reminded me of my dream (I dreamt that one of my friend is leaving the world and I was so scared cos I haven't tell her sth impt.) That was the same feeling, the same urgency... I pleaded to God for her. He gave me the desire to fast and pray... now I really understand that desire/burden to fast & pray... I never had it before. I used to fast cos everyone was doing so... now I'm serious. As she shared with me how many times she tried to commit suicide but was always saved. I think that's Grace. Even ytd, I heard she was about to jump but someone found her just in time and she was sent to IMH... it is really by the grace of God. Do join me in prayer for salvation of this lady...
It wasn't easy though, not only do I struggled with food, I struggled with tiredness and even my so humanly natured selfish thoughts... own desire of dieting (that's definately not my reason God prompted me to fast!). I know it's a temptation. I confessed many times and ask God for strength... He reminded me that He is my strength and He reminded me that man shall not live by bread alone but by every word that comes from the mouth of God. I also asked to remain pure & tender at heart and He reminded me not to forget the things He had done in my life, how He touched my heart, etc... He reminded me to be urgent for the lost and filled me with compassion again... I prayed that I will never forget His heartbeat... how He feels for the lost...
He could easily change hearts but why does He allow me to go though such sufferings to bring the lost to Him? And yet I'm not perfect. Look how impure am I, struggling with so much? God says, He loves me and wants me to be part of His plan... He wants me to grow, to be more like Him... It is during this time when I'm at my weakest that I come to depend on Him more... Thank God for bringing me thru this day...
I remembered years ago, I was a lukewarm christian, a christian who never lived life victorously, a christian who's always hiding... but ever since He touched my heart by His love, I told Him that I desire Him and wants to be like Him... that was I think in 2003. I didn't had my prayers answered immediately, and I still feared and didn't have much faith in Him but like what He promised in His word, "Faith as small as a mustard seed moved mountains..." I went through alot still... It was only recently that I see my prayers answered. Even though I'm not faithful, He always is. He heard me the very moment I spoke to Him. I realised that God allowed so much things to happen in my life before He answered my prayers so that I'll be prepared for this moment when He gives me this desire... that I will know what to do with it...
I'm so thankful! Indeed. God has a time for everything (Ecc 3). "Ask and it will be given to you; seek, and you shall find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks recieves, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened. Or what man is there among you who, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? or asks for a fish, will give a serpant? If you then being evil, know how to give good gifts to you children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good gifts to those who asks Him!" (Matt 7:7-11)
God desires YOU so much more than what you think. If you want to expereince His love yet do not have the desire, ASK. It may take a few days, a few months, a few years, a whole life! Keep asking!!! Remember His promises (in bold)!
To confess, I never had the boldness to post any spiritual/religous stuff online... cos I thought they were sensitive issues. I want to please my readers... I want ppl to read and come and not get offended. So I wrote 2 different sets- my personal journal (that's is truly from my heart) and my blog (that's for readers to enjoy). But I think God really touched my heart and I really want to share it with all of you. I'm too selfish to hide... I pray that all will experieence this LOVE. GOD LOVES YOU SO SO SO MUCH!!! PHRA YESU RAK KHOON MAK MAK!!! :)
This attachment is never the same. I thought my heart was already hardened. I thought I had seen it all... but this attachment is so different. No longer am I concerned about doing all the work (prarmeters, keeping the patients clean, clearing bedpans, making the ward look neat) but rather I'm concerned with the patients more. God really helped me to have a tender heart again- to really feel for ppl (He gave me when I was young but I lost it somehow)... I saw this lady who told me that she wanted to die. God's love really overwhelmes me at that moment. It just saddens my heart. I kept on telling her that she cannot go yet, she have yet to see the light... She told me that she have no chance to see that light. It reminded me of my dream (I dreamt that one of my friend is leaving the world and I was so scared cos I haven't tell her sth impt.) That was the same feeling, the same urgency... I pleaded to God for her. He gave me the desire to fast and pray... now I really understand that desire/burden to fast & pray... I never had it before. I used to fast cos everyone was doing so... now I'm serious. As she shared with me how many times she tried to commit suicide but was always saved. I think that's Grace. Even ytd, I heard she was about to jump but someone found her just in time and she was sent to IMH... it is really by the grace of God. Do join me in prayer for salvation of this lady...
It wasn't easy though, not only do I struggled with food, I struggled with tiredness and even my so humanly natured selfish thoughts... own desire of dieting (that's definately not my reason God prompted me to fast!). I know it's a temptation. I confessed many times and ask God for strength... He reminded me that He is my strength and He reminded me that man shall not live by bread alone but by every word that comes from the mouth of God. I also asked to remain pure & tender at heart and He reminded me not to forget the things He had done in my life, how He touched my heart, etc... He reminded me to be urgent for the lost and filled me with compassion again... I prayed that I will never forget His heartbeat... how He feels for the lost...
He could easily change hearts but why does He allow me to go though such sufferings to bring the lost to Him? And yet I'm not perfect. Look how impure am I, struggling with so much? God says, He loves me and wants me to be part of His plan... He wants me to grow, to be more like Him... It is during this time when I'm at my weakest that I come to depend on Him more... Thank God for bringing me thru this day...
I remembered years ago, I was a lukewarm christian, a christian who never lived life victorously, a christian who's always hiding... but ever since He touched my heart by His love, I told Him that I desire Him and wants to be like Him... that was I think in 2003. I didn't had my prayers answered immediately, and I still feared and didn't have much faith in Him but like what He promised in His word, "Faith as small as a mustard seed moved mountains..." I went through alot still... It was only recently that I see my prayers answered. Even though I'm not faithful, He always is. He heard me the very moment I spoke to Him. I realised that God allowed so much things to happen in my life before He answered my prayers so that I'll be prepared for this moment when He gives me this desire... that I will know what to do with it...
I'm so thankful! Indeed. God has a time for everything (Ecc 3). "Ask and it will be given to you; seek, and you shall find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks recieves, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened. Or what man is there among you who, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? or asks for a fish, will give a serpant? If you then being evil, know how to give good gifts to you children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good gifts to those who asks Him!" (Matt 7:7-11)
God desires YOU so much more than what you think. If you want to expereince His love yet do not have the desire, ASK. It may take a few days, a few months, a few years, a whole life! Keep asking!!! Remember His promises (in bold)!
To confess, I never had the boldness to post any spiritual/religous stuff online... cos I thought they were sensitive issues. I want to please my readers... I want ppl to read and come and not get offended. So I wrote 2 different sets- my personal journal (that's is truly from my heart) and my blog (that's for readers to enjoy). But I think God really touched my heart and I really want to share it with all of you. I'm too selfish to hide... I pray that all will experieence this LOVE. GOD LOVES YOU SO SO SO MUCH!!! PHRA YESU RAK KHOON MAK MAK!!! :)
Monday, October 09, 2006
hello i'm back!!!
haha. do continue to keep my team in prayer. they'll be there till 12th oct! I'll just summarise things that impacted me the most...
Day 1:
I'm so indeed grateful God brought me through the preparations and stuff. It wasn't easy but God was faithful as He'd promised. He will provide. You just have to listen to His voice, obey, trust and go. I remembered at the spore airport, one malaysian girl forgt to bring her student card (which she needs) and she has to go thru all the procedures. We keep throwing in solutions initially but we were reminded by a staff to pray. After praying, everything was ok! We should have started praying earlier. It was an impt lesson. In the plane, we played "Big 2". Was really fun! My friend said sth that strucks me, "You gotta get rid of all the smaller cards in order to win". It reminded me of a verse, "let us lay aside every weight, and the sin that so easily ensnares..." Heb 12:1-2. Ha. The smaller cards are just like the sin. Anyway, after we touched down in bangkok, we couldn't find the liason person. I prayed with another girl and the man appeared in front of us! That's what God taught me- to put Him first. He also added more faith and trust in me!
Day 2:
Today, God showed me that it is only He who could change and touch hearts, not how good speaker/teacher am I. I was at a lost cos I feel I'm not good enough to guide a girl along in the role of prayer & worship I/C so I prayed and trusted her into God's hands. I got my desire to intercede through my last mission trip at charis (if u r interested, u can ask me) after God added me so much faith! I do not know how to go about spreading this desire. She shared with me how she did not have the desire to pray but how much she wanted it. I prayed for her. Today, she spoke sth tt touched my heart deeply. While we were having worship, she saw 2 construction workers outside our hotel offering insence. Her voice was filled with compassion as she prayed for the 2 men. I was so touched bcos I know God is doing a work in her life and changing her heart to be more sensitive, loving, compassionate and prayerful. I was soooo excited!
In the afternoon, we had personal retreat. It was a time to rest & relax in God. God showed me that there were too many things between me and Him, though they were good... things like church, ministry, people... i'm too focused on good works that drains me to spend personal time with Him. Often I find myself not spending time with Him cos I need to sleep. I find myself always tired... Then He brought me to a verse, "My soul find rest in God alone" Ps. 62:1. I realize that He wants to restore me, to transform me, to give me grace and give me strength to love others along the way. Only He can satisfy my soul, my inner most... the emptiness that no one knows...
Then, at night, we went to the palladium to give out bibles to the chinese tourist. Dark clouds formed and it started to drizzle. We prayed that God hold back the rain so we could continue His work. He did! The rain stopped and we continued.
Back to the hotel... err super budget one. We had a blackout. At first I was a lil disamyed cos I was halfway thru washing my clothes! I prayed, "God please let the lights come again but if this is Your will, let Your will be done." I remembered God always has a plan for allowing certain things to happen. Anyway, I didn't give it much thought. I just told God that I trust Him... His ways are always higher than mine. Was on our way to lobby so we would have the light to read our bibles. (as I was walking, God reminded me of how Paul was locked up in the prison and he still praised God and then the metal bars in the prison were opened! I remembered, "give thanks in all circumstances" so I sang praise songs to Him along the way) Little did I know, God just impressed upon my roommate's heart to be sensitive and reminded her that ministry starts everywhere. We made friends with this particular chinese tourist. We could have missed this opportunity if God hadn't place that sensitiveness, that reminder, that prompting and even the boldness in my friend's heart. Glad she obeyed all the promptings in her heart. After we finished talking to her, the lights went on! We learnt that she'll be leaving the next day's morning and guessed what? So happened that the both of us (not the whole team) were on lobby ministry the next morning, which means both of us will be seeing her tommorow again! Isn't it too much of a coincidence? We made her a card, spend some time with God and slept.
Day 3:
Indeed, my roommate saw her and passed the card to her. We made friends with a group of americans from tenasee who's also on missions. I was so encouraged by their faith to come to a totally foreign land where they couldn't even speak thai nor chi, yet I could see the love and compassion for those ppl that overcomes their fear. But God saw them thru. I ended up as a translator b/w English and Mandarin. Ha. It was fun! I think the chinese tourist felt the love that we had for them, that's why they were open and willing to share. Of course there were some who were skeptical, just like how it happened in the book of acts. "some had doubts" Anyway, those who were opened exchanged contact and took photos! Really enjoyed the time.
Today during devotion, something struck me. You know, it would be so easy for God to come to earth and show everyone the nails and holes in His hands. In that way, everyone would believe in Him. Why doesn't He does that? It is because God loves human so much that He wants to use us and mould us. He wants us to be part of His plan. God has chosen us to witness for Him, though it is a more difficult path. I can picture that because even though sometimes I think I could do it better and it would be so much easier if I did it alone but I would allow others in my planning (esp my juniors) cos I want them to learn. I choose to trust them even though there might be a possibility that they might not do it properly. I'm more interested in the growing process, their character development rather than the outcome. I think it's the same for God. And He's better. Haha. He even promised us that our weaknesses are made perfect in His strength! Of course, I can never comphrehen God but that's just part of Him I've learnt.
God continue to answer my prayers throughout- the rain stopped. ppl recieved. He gave me strength with the little sleep I had (I would probably stone but I was still alert and praying.) And He gave me the joy that blots out the tiredness!
Day 4
We went to United Christian Ministries in thailand, pattaya. We had worshiped in the languages of all ppl that were represented there- Thais, Americans and Singaporeans. The song leader was a thai. God just lead us to a wonderful time of worship. I saw and felt how God had unite us with the love of God. I was so touched and encouraged by the work He's doing in thailand. They even had ministries reaching out to the prostitutes so that even they could experience God's love and be changed and transformed! Then we had a wonderful time of prayer to pray for the land. We were reminded of this verse, "If my people who are called by my name will humble themselves, and pray and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land." 2 Chron 7:14. Really enjoyed the fellowship with my fellow bros and sis in Christ. Nothing could seperate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus.
We were at the pier again praying and giving out bibles. I saw jellyfish! Wow, wonderful creation! Today, a few things that saddens my heart though... one. ppl who rejected God's word. two. one of my teammates rejected my gummy pizza (she meant it for good la). haha. oh, but she gave me a big hug after tt. :) :) :). haha. Well, I think God's heart is even sadder. As I spent time with Him the next morning, He gave me such a great burden to pray for the couple I saw at the pier. Now I understand why Nehmiah fasted, mourned and prayed for the sins of his people. I didn't fast though. I just cried and prayed. I couldn't describe that burden... but after praying, I felt release.
Day 5:
We went to the slums today to give out food and spread God's love. We had a skit, song and one of our teammate shared her testimony of how God changed her life. (you can ask for mine if you want) I'm very touched cos God didn't forget these ppl at all. They lived in literally a house that's made of wood and nails that rain could seep through. Their playground is only sand/mud. Yet God still reached out His loving hands to them. At that point, we really prayed for the love of God to overwhelm us. Amazingly, we really didn't mind them at all. We shook hands and hugged them. Neither dirt, tattoos or the fierce looks hindered us! Oh, I saw a really CUTE baby! I carried him, and he laughed at one of my teammates "peek-a-boo!!!" Along the way, we played games like, "say SILK 10 times" then, "what do cows drink?". Naturally they'd say "MILK" haha. It struck me that things we feed ourselves with eg. the things we see, watch, hear, even out thoughts, will natually come out in speech/actions. I was really stunned at the lessons I got from like anything? haha.
Oh, it was only today that I knew that the dancers walking past us every night where transexuals. They looked so pretty, like barbie doll... perfect figure. perhaps better than girls. But I also learn that there is a story behind everyone who chooses this line. Well, do pray for them that they would find love and security in God... God doesn't look at the outside. He looks at the inside- our hearts.
Day 6:
This is the day God really convicts my heart through his tender reminder. Though God was doing many wonderful things, I realised that as days goes by, I began to get less excited. It gets so routine. God will surely ans our prayers. Sometimes, I even forgot to pray. I took His blessings for granted. But today God really struck me hard (not literally). The passage was in Acts 5:1-11 on how Ananias lied to the Holy Spirit. They lied that they have given all their possesions but in fact they had kept some. Earlier the passage it says that the believers shared all things so they could probably be pressurized to do so and to save face, they lied. He convicts me that my heart isnt pure. My heart doesn't match my words/actions sometimes. I may be pressurized to be spiritual outwardly, doing the work and stuff but it doesn't match my heart that's no longer excited. I do things by my own strength and not by the power of the Holy Spirit subsequently. God reminded me that only He could give me the excitement, so I needed to continually depend on Him and ask for the filling of the Holy Spirit. God also brought to remembrance the different situations that my heart isnt pure, like when I worship/jumped/serve in ministry. Thank God for His grace is sufficient for me! He reminded me that He sees my heart ultimately. My actions should be based on the outflow of the Holy Spirit that is in me and the close relationship I had with God. I confessed and asked God for a pure & tender heart that desires to please God and feel what God feels.
Day 7:
I do enjoy the time spent with the team, esp my roommate! God placed everyone of them for a purpose. To Christine, Staff I/C, for her concerns and listening ear, enjoyed sharing with you, also gain much insights. To Mylene, Staff, for praying with me. I learnt lots from her. To be really sensitive to the Holy Spirit. To remain tender and pure at heart. Samuel, TL, a caring person, who's wise and confident at making decisions and sharings. Quite daring and unexpected. Whoa. treated his mortal so NICE! Elsa, ATL, fun-loving person that really cares for each one of us too. haha... i love her massage. Whoa... superb! better than the thai massage. haha. it was really fun with her! Eileen, Treasurer cum Admin, one who brought joy & laughter! LOL. She was forfieted to eat crikets. YUCKS! haha. oh my dear angel. Thanks for all the bookmarks, cards, chocs & encouragements. It comes when I needed them! Yanxiang, Logistics, one who has much to say but I really enjoyed listening and there gain insights! Lily, P&W I/C, oh my i'm so encouraged by u!!! God is indeed working in ur life. Thanks for sharing about ur fears and past. I'm so glad u r free from it now. Su Yi, Welfare, my dearest DG!! Haha... I'm so encouraged and suprised by the card u wrote on the last day... I think u've grown and I believe God will cont to work in ur life! Sara, Reporter, oh dear girl. I love ur child-likeliness!!! haha. enjoyed praying with u too for u always sees the heart of God. so pure... and u r really CUTE and SWEET and i love ur BIG HUGS!! :)
It was fun hanging out with the team! went shopping... not enuff time I think. Then went beach. Coconut was YUMMY! The wind was nice, the sky was beautiful. Nice place to sleep I think. haha. Then went to this lady's house for dinner. A very nice lady. She gave me a bear (I'll tell u the story if I had the time)! The thing I rem was her hug. Oh, that hug really made me cry (I held back my tears though) and don't feel like going back to spore. I'll miss her. Oh and I'll miss sue's team from tenasee, rob, tommy, kathy, marilyn... they taught me a v. cool HI-5! And there's dave who speaks fluent thai and shoot rubberbands at us. haha. I'm impressed with mark- this caucasian who can speak chi so fluently and he's with so much joy and love for the people!
Then, we went back to the hotel, my roommate and I were so thirsty, we drank and the water tasted so nice! Somehow, it struck me about the hearts of the ppl. When ppl are really thirsty and hungry for God's word/love, they will find it sweet. But when they're hearts do not desire God, they will not find it sweet.
Anyway, I truly, sincerely miss them all!!!
Oh last but not least, thank God for His faithfulness in answering prayers. He hold back the rain every night for us to give out the bibles!!
Day 8:
I learnt sth today also, even though I'm going home. I realise that I'm too focus on sleeping in the cab that I close up myself to God's promptings. All that's in my mind was sleep, sleep and sleep. But my roommate was once again open to God's voice and sensitive. She prayed for the taxi driver. Wow. Yupp. So amazing, God spoke to me even when I'm going home.
Oh I love the food in thai, phad thai, papaya salad, green curry, tom yum, morning glory, mee soup, beef noodles. i love everything i ate. haha. and i love the ppl there, so nice, polite and gentle... i love the "sawadeeka" and their "kok koon kha". sounds so nice! hahaha. Then I learnt, "phra yesu rak khoon mak mak!" :) i love the beach, the wind and the coconut!! :)
haha. do continue to keep my team in prayer. they'll be there till 12th oct! I'll just summarise things that impacted me the most...
Day 1:
I'm so indeed grateful God brought me through the preparations and stuff. It wasn't easy but God was faithful as He'd promised. He will provide. You just have to listen to His voice, obey, trust and go. I remembered at the spore airport, one malaysian girl forgt to bring her student card (which she needs) and she has to go thru all the procedures. We keep throwing in solutions initially but we were reminded by a staff to pray. After praying, everything was ok! We should have started praying earlier. It was an impt lesson. In the plane, we played "Big 2". Was really fun! My friend said sth that strucks me, "You gotta get rid of all the smaller cards in order to win". It reminded me of a verse, "let us lay aside every weight, and the sin that so easily ensnares..." Heb 12:1-2. Ha. The smaller cards are just like the sin. Anyway, after we touched down in bangkok, we couldn't find the liason person. I prayed with another girl and the man appeared in front of us! That's what God taught me- to put Him first. He also added more faith and trust in me!
Day 2:
Today, God showed me that it is only He who could change and touch hearts, not how good speaker/teacher am I. I was at a lost cos I feel I'm not good enough to guide a girl along in the role of prayer & worship I/C so I prayed and trusted her into God's hands. I got my desire to intercede through my last mission trip at charis (if u r interested, u can ask me) after God added me so much faith! I do not know how to go about spreading this desire. She shared with me how she did not have the desire to pray but how much she wanted it. I prayed for her. Today, she spoke sth tt touched my heart deeply. While we were having worship, she saw 2 construction workers outside our hotel offering insence. Her voice was filled with compassion as she prayed for the 2 men. I was so touched bcos I know God is doing a work in her life and changing her heart to be more sensitive, loving, compassionate and prayerful. I was soooo excited!
In the afternoon, we had personal retreat. It was a time to rest & relax in God. God showed me that there were too many things between me and Him, though they were good... things like church, ministry, people... i'm too focused on good works that drains me to spend personal time with Him. Often I find myself not spending time with Him cos I need to sleep. I find myself always tired... Then He brought me to a verse, "My soul find rest in God alone" Ps. 62:1. I realize that He wants to restore me, to transform me, to give me grace and give me strength to love others along the way. Only He can satisfy my soul, my inner most... the emptiness that no one knows...
Then, at night, we went to the palladium to give out bibles to the chinese tourist. Dark clouds formed and it started to drizzle. We prayed that God hold back the rain so we could continue His work. He did! The rain stopped and we continued.
Back to the hotel... err super budget one. We had a blackout. At first I was a lil disamyed cos I was halfway thru washing my clothes! I prayed, "God please let the lights come again but if this is Your will, let Your will be done." I remembered God always has a plan for allowing certain things to happen. Anyway, I didn't give it much thought. I just told God that I trust Him... His ways are always higher than mine. Was on our way to lobby so we would have the light to read our bibles. (as I was walking, God reminded me of how Paul was locked up in the prison and he still praised God and then the metal bars in the prison were opened! I remembered, "give thanks in all circumstances" so I sang praise songs to Him along the way) Little did I know, God just impressed upon my roommate's heart to be sensitive and reminded her that ministry starts everywhere. We made friends with this particular chinese tourist. We could have missed this opportunity if God hadn't place that sensitiveness, that reminder, that prompting and even the boldness in my friend's heart. Glad she obeyed all the promptings in her heart. After we finished talking to her, the lights went on! We learnt that she'll be leaving the next day's morning and guessed what? So happened that the both of us (not the whole team) were on lobby ministry the next morning, which means both of us will be seeing her tommorow again! Isn't it too much of a coincidence? We made her a card, spend some time with God and slept.
Day 3:
Indeed, my roommate saw her and passed the card to her. We made friends with a group of americans from tenasee who's also on missions. I was so encouraged by their faith to come to a totally foreign land where they couldn't even speak thai nor chi, yet I could see the love and compassion for those ppl that overcomes their fear. But God saw them thru. I ended up as a translator b/w English and Mandarin. Ha. It was fun! I think the chinese tourist felt the love that we had for them, that's why they were open and willing to share. Of course there were some who were skeptical, just like how it happened in the book of acts. "some had doubts" Anyway, those who were opened exchanged contact and took photos! Really enjoyed the time.
Today during devotion, something struck me. You know, it would be so easy for God to come to earth and show everyone the nails and holes in His hands. In that way, everyone would believe in Him. Why doesn't He does that? It is because God loves human so much that He wants to use us and mould us. He wants us to be part of His plan. God has chosen us to witness for Him, though it is a more difficult path. I can picture that because even though sometimes I think I could do it better and it would be so much easier if I did it alone but I would allow others in my planning (esp my juniors) cos I want them to learn. I choose to trust them even though there might be a possibility that they might not do it properly. I'm more interested in the growing process, their character development rather than the outcome. I think it's the same for God. And He's better. Haha. He even promised us that our weaknesses are made perfect in His strength! Of course, I can never comphrehen God but that's just part of Him I've learnt.
God continue to answer my prayers throughout- the rain stopped. ppl recieved. He gave me strength with the little sleep I had (I would probably stone but I was still alert and praying.) And He gave me the joy that blots out the tiredness!
Day 4
We went to United Christian Ministries in thailand, pattaya. We had worshiped in the languages of all ppl that were represented there- Thais, Americans and Singaporeans. The song leader was a thai. God just lead us to a wonderful time of worship. I saw and felt how God had unite us with the love of God. I was so touched and encouraged by the work He's doing in thailand. They even had ministries reaching out to the prostitutes so that even they could experience God's love and be changed and transformed! Then we had a wonderful time of prayer to pray for the land. We were reminded of this verse, "If my people who are called by my name will humble themselves, and pray and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land." 2 Chron 7:14. Really enjoyed the fellowship with my fellow bros and sis in Christ. Nothing could seperate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus.
We were at the pier again praying and giving out bibles. I saw jellyfish! Wow, wonderful creation! Today, a few things that saddens my heart though... one. ppl who rejected God's word. two. one of my teammates rejected my gummy pizza (she meant it for good la). haha. oh, but she gave me a big hug after tt. :) :) :). haha. Well, I think God's heart is even sadder. As I spent time with Him the next morning, He gave me such a great burden to pray for the couple I saw at the pier. Now I understand why Nehmiah fasted, mourned and prayed for the sins of his people. I didn't fast though. I just cried and prayed. I couldn't describe that burden... but after praying, I felt release.
Day 5:
We went to the slums today to give out food and spread God's love. We had a skit, song and one of our teammate shared her testimony of how God changed her life. (you can ask for mine if you want) I'm very touched cos God didn't forget these ppl at all. They lived in literally a house that's made of wood and nails that rain could seep through. Their playground is only sand/mud. Yet God still reached out His loving hands to them. At that point, we really prayed for the love of God to overwhelm us. Amazingly, we really didn't mind them at all. We shook hands and hugged them. Neither dirt, tattoos or the fierce looks hindered us! Oh, I saw a really CUTE baby! I carried him, and he laughed at one of my teammates "peek-a-boo!!!" Along the way, we played games like, "say SILK 10 times" then, "what do cows drink?". Naturally they'd say "MILK" haha. It struck me that things we feed ourselves with eg. the things we see, watch, hear, even out thoughts, will natually come out in speech/actions. I was really stunned at the lessons I got from like anything? haha.
Oh, it was only today that I knew that the dancers walking past us every night where transexuals. They looked so pretty, like barbie doll... perfect figure. perhaps better than girls. But I also learn that there is a story behind everyone who chooses this line. Well, do pray for them that they would find love and security in God... God doesn't look at the outside. He looks at the inside- our hearts.
Day 6:
This is the day God really convicts my heart through his tender reminder. Though God was doing many wonderful things, I realised that as days goes by, I began to get less excited. It gets so routine. God will surely ans our prayers. Sometimes, I even forgot to pray. I took His blessings for granted. But today God really struck me hard (not literally). The passage was in Acts 5:1-11 on how Ananias lied to the Holy Spirit. They lied that they have given all their possesions but in fact they had kept some. Earlier the passage it says that the believers shared all things so they could probably be pressurized to do so and to save face, they lied. He convicts me that my heart isnt pure. My heart doesn't match my words/actions sometimes. I may be pressurized to be spiritual outwardly, doing the work and stuff but it doesn't match my heart that's no longer excited. I do things by my own strength and not by the power of the Holy Spirit subsequently. God reminded me that only He could give me the excitement, so I needed to continually depend on Him and ask for the filling of the Holy Spirit. God also brought to remembrance the different situations that my heart isnt pure, like when I worship/jumped/serve in ministry. Thank God for His grace is sufficient for me! He reminded me that He sees my heart ultimately. My actions should be based on the outflow of the Holy Spirit that is in me and the close relationship I had with God. I confessed and asked God for a pure & tender heart that desires to please God and feel what God feels.
Day 7:
I do enjoy the time spent with the team, esp my roommate! God placed everyone of them for a purpose. To Christine, Staff I/C, for her concerns and listening ear, enjoyed sharing with you, also gain much insights. To Mylene, Staff, for praying with me. I learnt lots from her. To be really sensitive to the Holy Spirit. To remain tender and pure at heart. Samuel, TL, a caring person, who's wise and confident at making decisions and sharings. Quite daring and unexpected. Whoa. treated his mortal so NICE! Elsa, ATL, fun-loving person that really cares for each one of us too. haha... i love her massage. Whoa... superb! better than the thai massage. haha. it was really fun with her! Eileen, Treasurer cum Admin, one who brought joy & laughter! LOL. She was forfieted to eat crikets. YUCKS! haha. oh my dear angel. Thanks for all the bookmarks, cards, chocs & encouragements. It comes when I needed them! Yanxiang, Logistics, one who has much to say but I really enjoyed listening and there gain insights! Lily, P&W I/C, oh my i'm so encouraged by u!!! God is indeed working in ur life. Thanks for sharing about ur fears and past. I'm so glad u r free from it now. Su Yi, Welfare, my dearest DG!! Haha... I'm so encouraged and suprised by the card u wrote on the last day... I think u've grown and I believe God will cont to work in ur life! Sara, Reporter, oh dear girl. I love ur child-likeliness!!! haha. enjoyed praying with u too for u always sees the heart of God. so pure... and u r really CUTE and SWEET and i love ur BIG HUGS!! :)
It was fun hanging out with the team! went shopping... not enuff time I think. Then went beach. Coconut was YUMMY! The wind was nice, the sky was beautiful. Nice place to sleep I think. haha. Then went to this lady's house for dinner. A very nice lady. She gave me a bear (I'll tell u the story if I had the time)! The thing I rem was her hug. Oh, that hug really made me cry (I held back my tears though) and don't feel like going back to spore. I'll miss her. Oh and I'll miss sue's team from tenasee, rob, tommy, kathy, marilyn... they taught me a v. cool HI-5! And there's dave who speaks fluent thai and shoot rubberbands at us. haha. I'm impressed with mark- this caucasian who can speak chi so fluently and he's with so much joy and love for the people!
Then, we went back to the hotel, my roommate and I were so thirsty, we drank and the water tasted so nice! Somehow, it struck me about the hearts of the ppl. When ppl are really thirsty and hungry for God's word/love, they will find it sweet. But when they're hearts do not desire God, they will not find it sweet.
Anyway, I truly, sincerely miss them all!!!
Oh last but not least, thank God for His faithfulness in answering prayers. He hold back the rain every night for us to give out the bibles!!
Day 8:
I learnt sth today also, even though I'm going home. I realise that I'm too focus on sleeping in the cab that I close up myself to God's promptings. All that's in my mind was sleep, sleep and sleep. But my roommate was once again open to God's voice and sensitive. She prayed for the taxi driver. Wow. Yupp. So amazing, God spoke to me even when I'm going home.
Oh I love the food in thai, phad thai, papaya salad, green curry, tom yum, morning glory, mee soup, beef noodles. i love everything i ate. haha. and i love the ppl there, so nice, polite and gentle... i love the "sawadeeka" and their "kok koon kha". sounds so nice! hahaha. Then I learnt, "phra yesu rak khoon mak mak!" :) i love the beach, the wind and the coconut!! :)
Saturday, September 30, 2006
God's grace
By God's grace, He provided me with the finances. $700 in full!!! Nothing more, nothing less!!! Amazing God!!! Though I was fearful at the beginning, but I thank God for His assurance that He'll provide all that I need! And that gave me the faith!!! Even as time is running short and I still lacked but I'll always remember His assurance and trust Him and true enough, He provided everything I needed just in time!!!
Oh dear friends, I'll be away from 1st till 8th of october. I'll share with you more when I'm back! Till then, take care! :)
Love in Christ,
Sharon
Oh dear friends, I'll be away from 1st till 8th of october. I'll share with you more when I'm back! Till then, take care! :)
Love in Christ,
Sharon
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