Sunday, August 20, 2006

Running

Running

I had running experiences before but it wasnt a good one. I accompanied my friend to take part in sheares bridge run (5km) 3 or 4 years back and i took 1 hr+. A word to describe, it was quite torturous. I couldn't stand the heat, the breathlessness, the tiredness, the sweat and everything. i ended up walking for most of the journey and was very, very tired.

This first experience with events like this- is my first step. Adding on, I'm often out for first aid duty, i've saw ppl running the standard chartered marathon for the past 2 years. Each faces spelled determination and perseverance. In my heart, I truly admire them, especially the kids participating. I think they are awesome -to have ran a marathon at such a young age. Perhaps, that determines my enthusiasm in taking part in this year's new balance real run.

It was decided almost immediately- without much thought. Instead, it's like a reaction.
[below is not the exact words, just an aggaration]

Jane: Wei Jie ask me whether wanna go walk 10 km anot.
Shu Yan: Go la, if its me i'll go lor.
Jane: Siao arh... 10 km lehs...
Shu Yan: Walk only ma...

A few days later,

Jane: Eh I help you take the form already, you said you wanna go right? It's $23.
Shu Yan: Oh ya...
Jane: Must hand in by tmr
Shu Yan: Orh. ok.

To be frank, I kind of regretted my decision cos I feel that it's without thought. Firstly, I didn't check the exam timetable beforehand and the run is just 1 day before my bio paper. Secondly, I struggled with 5km before, how will I be able to complete 10km? Thirdly, Eileen asked me if I wanna do duty for this event and I want!! but i can't cos I already signed up. I didn't know there's this duty...

Anyway, since the date that i signed up was quite far from the actual day, it didn't really affect me much so, life goes on... then one day i was out on first aid duty again. We rendered first aid for the NUS Triatholon. I saw how the participants ran, i saw how a lady with large, white blisters on her feet struggled to finish the race, i saw how she dragged her feet but kept running, i saw how they sweat and perspire, i saw their thirst yet they keep on going... I can never imagine myself in a Triatholon. It's too tough. But that duty gave me the motivation to run what I've signed up for. What is 10km to them? They swam 1.5km, cycled 60km and ran15km! It's time for me to train, to set my aim, focus and objectives for this run. I see no point in taking part in an event just for fun. I can might as well ask a few friends to jog with me. Time is indeed precious. It is a wonderful gift from God. Life is fragile and unpredictable but I wanna make my time here on earth worthwhile. Every experience=new insights gained/new lessons learnt. It makes you stronger if you managed to come out of it. I believe it is not wasted. Hence, I listed my objectives and took actions.

Sadly, time was limited. I started my first 5km on tues. Cramped for 3 days, so couldn't run then on. Felt so stressed due to exams and personal objectives of the run. Went church on Sat, the worship song spoke to me... God of miracles, as if telling me to leave my stress into His hands, He is great enough to handle it. Then went for kids ministry duty, again the worship. It was really a prayer of my heart, it's like a response of the 1st song i mentioned earlier- "Lord, I give you my heart, I give you my soul, I live for you alone, every breath that i take, every moment i'm awake, Lord have your way in me." Everything just poured out (not tears but stress) and i felt a great release. I suddenly realise that my worth is not based on my own standards but really my worth is that I'm a child of God, and all the things that I'm already blessed with. Anyway, that night, I couldn't sleep, haha... probably was too excited. So i studied, and bored myself to sleep. Then sun came- the RUN.

The weather was fine. It started out well. I just kept running and running (except for the water points and the beach and abit of the last part that i walked) Strangely, I didn't struggled much except the very last part, unlike the 1st run i ran. Could even sprint 100m to the finish line. I was abit shocked when I see the timing 1hr 31min++, round up, 1hr 32min. I even started the run a lil later. I thought I would take 1hr 45min the least and prob will drag up to 2hr++. I was a lil out of breath cos of the sprint at the end but after a short rest and 100plus, I'm energised again. Haha, later I realised that 1hr 32mins is not a v. fast timing la. But still, i really thank God for it.

Analysis:
Swimming training improve my stamina and strength but I stopped going since Apr 06.
Physical Fitness Elective improved my stamina again but it ended in Jul 06.
Ran 2.4 occasionally at the park downstairs might have maintained it.
Swam occasionally at NYP/YSC might also maintained it but it wasnt as tough as swimming training so my stamina might have decreased too.
Motivated by NUS triatholon, esp the lady with the blister.
Ran 5km 4 days before the actual day in a time of 50mins.
Motivated by the SJAB ppl (seriously, you ppl are considered quite close to my heart. SJAB is a CCA i've been in since sec sch, that i poured out much time into, a CCA that gave me the experiences and chance. It develops me and grows my passion in nursing and first aid, it teaches me how to care... and the list goes on... most of all, it is the bonds forged.)

Now, I really wonder how i managed to ran 10km and with a timing that is less than 50mins x 2! It was really impossible for me, with all the things I went through. Anyway, i really thank God for all the things i've been through, even all the motivations i had to run. Through it all, it has indeed made me a stronger person in heart, body, mind and soul.

Friday, August 04, 2006

Meanwhile friends, enjoy...

I'LL BE THERE FOR YOU by REMBRANDTS

So no one told you life was gonna be this way
Your job's a joke, you're broke, your love life's DOA
It's like you're always stuck in second gear,
When it hasn't been your day, your week, your month, or even your year, but...

I'll be there for you...
When the rain starts to pour
I'll be there for you...
Like I've been there before
I'll be there for you...
'Cause you're there for me too.

You're still in bed at ten, though work begins at eight,
You burned your breakfast, so far things are going great,
Your mother warned you there'd be days like these,
But she didn't tell you when the world was brought down to your knees that...

I'll be there for you...
When the rain starts to pour
I'll be there for you...
Like I've been there before
I'll be there for you...
'Cause you're there for me too.

No one could ever know me.
No one could ever see me.
Seems your the only one who knows
What it's like to be me
Someone to face the day with.
Make it through all the mess with.
Someone I'll always laugh with.
Even at my worst, I'm best with....you - yeah

It's like you're always stuck in second gear,
When it hasn't been your day, your week, your month,or even your year, but...

I'll be there for you...
When the rain starts to pour
I'll be there for you...
Like I've been there before
I'll be there for you...
'Cause you're there for me too...

and stay tuned. :)

PS: heard this before? this song was used as a opening dance song for YTSS musical in 2004. :)
Sitted silently on my computer chair.
I could hear the faint whisper of the insects outside,
The wind of the fanblades spinning,
The clear, fast typing of the keyboard-
In the stillness.
The light uncovers every darkness of the room
It brings out every corner that was once hidden.
I leaned back.
Relaxed.
I closed my eyes,
Enjoying the cool, soft breeze on my skin,
As gentle as it is.
Yes, time is running away,
Like an ice melting in my hand.
Now I asked myself, "What am I doing?"
Like a little boat in the vast ocean,
Without a sense of direction.
Here I am blogging
Without a particular reason.
Well I better get back to work.
Tata for now.

Thursday, August 03, 2006

TIME

TIME

the clock is ticking off every second,
with every breath we take

and with every breath we take,
we are one breath nearer to death.

time and tide waits for no man.
once its gone,
IT IS GONE.

"the tragedy of life is not that it ends too soon, but that we wait so long to begin it."
-W.M.Lewis